"I'll title this blog some other time" Procrastination Joys

My greatest gadget right now is my phone. Not because it allows me to communicate better or keep up to date with what's happening on social media. But because it has the maps app. What's so special about that? I hear you ask. Well, I can get impatient as a driver and traffic is not my friend! So the moment I see brake lights, I'm looking for the nearest shortcut, the quickest route to get to my destination.

That's what we can be like in life in general. Looking for the nearest shortcut, the quickest way to get things done. But for me, I've found the quickest way to get things done, is to get things done. Sounds obvious, but hear me out.

This week, I had a day at work to finish displays in my classroom - laminating, cutting letters out, sticking up work! LONG! All I could think was that it was going to take ages! So then enters procrastination 😁 As I begin to think about how to complete this job quicker, I get distracted and begin to play on my phone! A job that I wanted to be finished asap, was now going to take me longer to finish.  Eventually I came to my senses and realised that the quickest way to get this job done, is to get the job done.

Sometimes we can befriend procrastination or chase after short cuts, only to find that the journey is going to take longer!

Shortcuts have their place, but the quickest way to get something done, is to get something done.

Float like a butterfly, but don't sting like a bee! (Fighting the Good Fight)

I am a semi hoarder. I like to hold onto objects from different seasons of my life like souvenirs. School work, concert tickets, plane tickets - and as I can't always find an appropriate place to put them I end up creating a tidy mess. After some time I realise that this is too much so I end up throwing everything away without even a second thought.

I sometimes do this with my feelings too. I can hold onto past hurts and offenses and not say a thing, creating a tidy mess in my head... Then it gets too much... Well let's just say theres no longer a tidy mess.

In my marriage I have found that in order to make good

progress, communication is key. Communicating my feelings in the right way instead of hoarding them keep us on the same page and working together as a team. I remember someone referencing 'we are to fight the good fight of faith' in discussing conflicts. It was mentioned that there are good fights and bad fights. Conflict is always going to arise in marriage and it's important how we handle them. So I've written 3 steps that have helped me and I hope they help you:

1. Be quick to listen and slow to speak and don't be offended so easily. At times things can be done or said and we are quick to get upset and frustrated. Then when we look back we see that our partner never had ill intentions and that we perceived things wrong. Or if we don't jump to conclusions and discuss things, we'll reach a better place of understanding. James 1:19 says that we should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. This says to me that I need to think before I speak, don't be easily offended and be understanding.

2. Say what you mean and mean what you say - remember Justin Bieber's song 'What do you mean?' My husband actually said to me that he sympathises with Justin because so many times in conversation my body language contradicts what I'm saying. I have a bad habit of saying I'm fine when I'm not. Like I said earlier, in order to work things through, you have to work things through- which leads us into point 3.

3. Speak the truth in love - when it is time to talk about things, say all you have to say truthfully, but make sure it's done in love. If I maintain the perspective that we're a team regardless of the situation and aim for us to still be a team by the end of the conversation, I need to make sure my words contain love. We can often state facts in a conversation and mix it with emotion saying things we don't mean. Our partner won't always separate the emotion and the fact which will have a detrimental effect on the conflict. 

These are just 3 short points and there are probably many more. These are not perfected points! The marriage journey is one of growth and development, so remember to smile in the sun and dance in the rain of marriage because the journey gets better with every step!

When I grow up...

I'm 28! This time 10 years ago, I was 18 getting ready to move out from my family home to go to university. The world was my oyster! I was part of the 'next generation' - shapeable and ready to learn to have an impact on this world that was promised to me. Ready to pursue 'what I wanted to do when I was older'.

Now I'm defined as being 2 years from 30. The world is no longer my oyster - in fact it is making demands of me! Now you should be married! Now you should have children! Now you should be living in a 4 bedroom house with room for 2 cars on the drive. If I contemplate studying again, the response is I'm too old or I should be thinking about settling down. But when did I become unshapeable (not a word I think) and not ready to learn to have an impact on this world! 

I am now inspired by those who are older than me and decide to go back to studying. Those who decide that they have more to offer this world and decide to learn more to do this! No matter what age we are at, it's never too late to do something different. Life is to be experienced and enjoyed, so don't let age or circumstance hold you back. We can always learn, we can always change the world!