Confessions of a Thinkaholic

Hi, my name's Antonique and I am a thinkaholic! I think all the time about everything! Sounds normal enough but there are times when it can be overwhelming and exhausting as you over process things. 'Did I say that okay?' Did I do that okay?' And if it's really bad, these thoughts serve as a distraction and disrupt life!

Last week I was enjoying the half term break, trying to catch up with people and sort things out. I had planned for Tuesday to be a rest day, whilst other days I would catch up with things. Operative words, 'I had planned' :(. I really spent Tuesday stressing about all the things that needed doing. So did I rest? But it's my own fault, as worrying about these things did not make a difference to the to-do list. 

It reminds me of a story in the Bible in Luke 10:38-41. You may have heard it before. Jesus visits his good friends Mary, Martha and Lazarus to chill for a while. Whilst there, Mary is sitting at Jesus' feet listening to his every word, but Martha is in the kitchen running around getting things done. Then Martha has enough and asks Jesus to tell Mary to help her in the kitchen. Instead of Jesus telling Mary to go and help Martha he tells Martha that she is distracted and worried. 

What I hadn't noticed before was that Luke says Martha opened up her door to Jesus, yet she was in the kitchen when He came. A lot of us invite Jesus into our lives, but don't find ourselves enjoying his company and presence. Because she was distracted and worried, she missed the One who was in her company as she was occupied with other things. Mary is described as having the right idea, as she finds herself sitting at the feet of Jesus. If you sat at someone's feet, you were being trained. So Mary was learning and growing. Martha was caught up following culture and tradition.

We can do the same. Caught up in the lie that we should be worrying about this and be distracted, we can rarely be present as we dwell in the past or the future. As I said earlier, we invite Jesus into our lives generally, but don't invite Him into situations specifically. Something that reassured me this week was the thought that He is the God of yesterday, today and tomorrow. He existed yesterday, he exists today and will exist tomorrow. If he created time and time is in His hands, then yesterday, today and tomorrow are in His hands. There's no need for me to be distracted and worried and I can remain present, because God is there.

So this is now my aim. Proverbs 31:25 'she smiles at the future'. To no longer be distracted and worried but rejoicing about the future :)